Tag Archives: art

I Went to the Berlin Art Fair on Saturday

Let’s face it:

People in my generation only attend art fairs

So we can harvest ideas

for T-shirts, interior design and Facebook cover images.

As a career philistine, I find it difficult to assess art

as anything other than a consumer.

Would I want this in my house?

Could I photoshop this into something I could post online?

Could this be an investment?

This doesn’t mean I’ve never had a visceral, intellectual or emotional reaction to a piece of art.

It just tells me where my reaction is coming from.

I don’t think this is new, necessarily.

Humans have always regarded beauty only through possession.

That’s why when someone says ‘nice coffee table’ or ‘neat hat’, we say ‘thank you’,

As if we have participated in an act of creation rather than an act of commerce.

Sometimes it bothers me that this doesn’t bother me.

Everybody sees the world as something that exists only around themselves.

Some of us just have cooler T-shirts.

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Filed under Berlin, Pictures

From The Bottom of My Art

Through a chain of serendipities, last week I ended up at Art Cologne, a trade fair for the art industry.

It's an opportunity for galleries to show off their artists, bag new clients and reach their yearly quota for the word ‘zeitgeist’.

I was wearing collared shirt and carrying a notebook, so people thought I was there to buy. As opposed to gawk and finagle, which was closer to the truth.

The art industry is the last true alchemy left in the modern economy.

Like most developed-world business models, it doesn’t really make anything.

It takes equal parts gossip, expectation and propaganda and turns them into revenue.

Collecting art is either an expression of self, the promotion of an idea or an investment in a commodity, depending on which two people are conversing.

Art galleries work like this: You rent a space, you give it a name, you find an artist. You put their stuff on the wall until someone buys it. You take a percentage and move on to the next wall.

It’s like running a mini-mart, except you don’t actually own anything you’re selling.

Creating art may be philosophy, but selling it is pure capitalism.

After the fair, I asked a gallery owner how he decides how much a particular piece will cost.

Why does this diorama, for example, cost $45,000?

Why not $10,000? Or $200,000?

‘Darling,’ he said.

‘It costs whatever they’ll pay.’

I asked him whether the artists attended.

‘You don’t see cows at a cattle rancher convention,’ he said.

After the show, I met a British performance artist

who had a job teaching English to factory workers in The Netherlands.

Instead of teaching them terms like ‘value chain’ and ‘synergy’, she replaced all the course materials with the works of Marx and explanations of labor rights.

‘If the school finds out, they’ll fire me,’ she said. ‘But it’s not a job, goddammit, it’s art.’

After last week I still agree with her sentiment.

But maybe not her italics.

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Filed under Germany, Personal, Pictures, Travel

China’s next top dissident

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Filed under Random

Banksy: Painter of Trite

Is anyone else getting hella sick of Banksy?

In case you missed the 'Marmaduke'-deep subtext here, this is a painting of people lining up to buy a shirt that says 'Destroy Capitalism' on it. Get it? They're buying a shirt with an anti-capitalist message on it! This is as motherfucking ironic as 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife.

For those of you who don't know, Banksy is the latest artist to capture the incredibly limited imaginations of auction-bidders, gallery-rats and museum curaterati the world over. He appears to have done this solely through the repetitive overboiling of the one concept he understands: Irony.

Oh my fucking God that dove symbolizes peace but that bulletproof vest du'int!

In case there is anyone in the sighted world who doesn't understand the profound juxtaposition here, Banksy has added a helpful sniper-sight to the dove, to really achieve the work's full tell-don't-show splendor.

None of this would bother me if Sucksy wasn't so fucking famous. Everything he does (like vandalizing a Paris Hilton album cover – way to really slaughter those sacred cows, Banks)  is greeted by RSS-clogging news alerts detailing the new facets of his shimmering genius. It's like being notified every time your 14 year old cousin writes in her diary.

Has anyone not looked at those kids wearing the Che Guevara T-shirts and thought 'you're a consumer, too, pal'? Heaven forbid an artist comment on this in a meaningful way, rather than just shallowly pointing out the first thing that pops into everyone's mind when they see goths at the supermarket. Banksy is like the amateur anarchist at your high school, pissed off at everything from government corruption to soggy cafeteria-fries, but incapable of doing anything more interesting than spray-painting his name on some street signs.

Oh, and the price of the last Banksy painting that sold at auction? $205,000. Now that's ironic.  

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Filed under Random